I felt a sense of impending doom when I left the bus. When I saw Saber sitting with the two helmets at the station, lost in thought, I wanted to hide behind one of the pilars and just watch him. Unfortunately, he spotted me just as this idea struck. As our eyes met, there was an edge to the way we looked at each other. Time apart had only brought a sense of reality, I was leaving in two days. 48 hours. While neither of us could tell you what was going on between us, the reality was it would soon be over. Spain is 6 hours away -- timewise and plane time -- its amazing how far that can be.
Saber handed me a helmet, and took my bag. We mounted the bike, and we were off and bound for el barrio. We have said little. Its crazy how two months ago we were strangers, and now I could read him like a book.
We parked the bike on the cobbled streets, and toss my bag in the apartment. Nacho is waiting on Saber at Las Columnas. When Nacho sees me, he can only shake his head. This crazy American, she is never going to leave!
We have a drink at the tables outside, and then move to another bar around the corner where we meet Carlos and Assun. We go to Cafe Giralda for dinner, and eat while standing at the bar.
We move to another place, all the while I feel the sands drip from the hourglass...slowly, steadily, painfully.
I feel my mind taking over my body as my heart goes in search of solace. I don't want to go. Not now. Not ever. I fought so hard to be here, and yet I know I must return to New York, even if its just to tidy up so I can come back.
But when I come back, it will be different. And everyone involved knows that. What those differences will be, are not yet known. And its that unknown that makes us cling to the present, for this might be all we have left...or it might be the beginning. But the truth is, no one knows. And its the not-knowing that makes these moments the hardest.
No comments:
Post a Comment